There were times...
When I think I need a break.
And when is that?
All the time.
When I'm studying, I can't wait to get my hands on the tele's remote control.
When I'm with the television, I surf channels like mad because I can't get enough of it. And when there's nothing to watch, I would ask myself "Why am I wasting my time with this?"
When I'm listening to my music, I'd daydream or just indulge in the song. A moment later, I would look at the time and go: "What the hell?"
Later, when I'm pretty much bored hearing to the same song over and over again, I open my laptop (like right now) and stare at the wallpaper that said: It is now safe to turn off your computer and read a book.
Hmm. Well, I got nothing to do in my laptop anyways. I turned the on/off button.
Following my wallpaper's instruction, I snuggle in bed and read my lately ignored book, Wolf Hall (SO not Pillars of the Earth). Ten pages later, I would get a little dizzy from the reflection of the fluorescent light and put the book away.
Then, I cast a thoughtful glance at my three sketchbook. Probably feeling light-feet, I got my pencil box and began to draw.
I would sketch a number of times, mulling over what to draw until eraser shavings got in my way. The feeling for artistic flow stopped and I gave up hope for another nominee---which I do not have the slightest clue what about. Brushing all the eraser shavings out of the way, I put away my pencil box and my sketch book for another day and wished I Photoshopped. Damn. I closed my laptop already. And I'm not going to open it the second time for the day.
Now what?
A moment of silence and wondering what's in the fridge.
If only we still had that birthday cake…
If only we had some Vitagen…
If only I was let to eat ONE MORE MAGNUM ICE-CREAM.
My eye would catch my pillow and I automatically take it. Hugging it for a while, I null in to a haze into a dark fog of sleep, with my glasses still on. My sister would take it off for me and in the middle of the night I would realize my other pillow is under me and blindly use my foot to perch it on my face. I'm an acrobat, really. I would dream about non-essential dreams: school, friends, missing the bus (ugh. I STILL got worried even after the dream. It's worse on Saturdays.) and never dream of more important things like the future or something. Or flying. Yeah. I miss flying.
Where was I? Oh right.
And that concludes: What Ash Would Do When She Has Nothing To Do.
Story of my life.
Live it.
(Well, I do.)
so you gotta change that pattern, you know?
