Truest Fact

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though I'm living in a place far from both of my extended families,
I love them to bits.
They never fail to make me feel like, well, family.

May Allah bless all to those who already have families to the ones who aren't even a year old.
Love you people.


Don't You Know How Expensive My Hair Is?

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awful trial with color pencils.
I will never learn!

But I L.O.V.E the hair. MY GOODNESS.
I want that.
I tried to make the eye-shadow a different color too.
I am seriously digging spiked shoulders.
Love spikes even before it was 'IN'.

I Very Much Do

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I Don't Know That Flower's Name

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I observed in envy.

You were there again,
but I can't remember the color of your shirt
(was it white once more?)
And I had this feeling of security again
that you were staying, and staying for good.
That wordless promise that arrives when you did.

You showed a picture you drew with black ink.
With fast, slim lines and long, thoughtful blobbed ends.
It was on a flimsy white paper like you spent all night making it.
Drips of lavender sprayed intentionally to romantacize the piece.
It was a __________ flower.

I forgot that you were skilled with your hands.
And I forgot that you could do this.
I forgot that you could surpass me.
How did I remember now?

I observed it with envy.
It enveloped me.
Reminding that you were happy and moved on
and made another masterpiece, forgetting me.
Where every time I start to draw,
I end up erasing everything over and over again
until I let go of it and realized I could move on.

The flower.
Why did you draw a flower?
Why did you made it in black ink?
Why did you ignore the colors it came with?
Why did you show me that drawing?

I woke up with the question unanswered.
That feeling of security evaporated as I inhaled the waking.
That beautiful drawing of that flower was gone but remained.
You showing me the flower was gone but remained.
Though, it was still gone.

And I watched with envy.

The Volume Is Only 84 Percent

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My sister said she can hear the songs 
I'm hearing in my earphones from 
eight feet away.

And that's how I listen to my music.

(But I'm starting to turn my head every two minutes
to the door because I keep hearing someone coming in.)

I Love This Movie

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I didn't remember the name so I have to type "Russell Crowe" into Google
and pops out "Russell Crowe Movies" and I thought, "That could work."

It's a predictable so-and-so flick
but it made me fall in love with Provence in Southeastern France.
I just remember there was this certain golden glow in the movie
and the empty swimming pool drenched in autumn leaves I found was rather poetic.

South of France.
How lovely does that sound?

I Hate Parking Technology

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You know how people complain about airports?
The meals? The seats? The attendants?
Well, I'm not bragging, but living in Malaysia and 
getting MAS airlines as our major choice, 
so far we haven't had any of those problems.

Until today.
It wasn't the plane.
It was the parking. At the airport.
Oh yeah.

My Dad was finished cancelling some tickets
and as we got back in the car, we keep on
seeing these signs that go

And we keep on asking, 

So my Dad decided I should go out and ask someone in the airport, handing me the ticket and 10 ringgit.
"If there is no payment counter in there, then these people are seriously stupid."
I went out with my brother and we kind of looked around the bottom floor of the airport
like complete idiots and I asked my brother to ask the security guard but he kept ignoring me
because I know he did not want to ask that.

Instead I asked him to ask a Maybank person.
Even the Maybank Person didn't know.

I was walking past some of the shops and not seeing any payment counters,
I was completely exasperated enough by
1. not finding the payment counter
2. upset that we would be stuck in the airport forever like Tom Hanks in The Terminal 
that was based on a true story which I can't remember who exactly but if you've seen the movie, you get it.
3. my brother is so unreliable (like that surprised me)
4. I was getting hungry.

I stalked up to the Hospitatily Center (I mean, COME ON)
and I asked ever so politely, "Excuse me, do you know where to pay for the parking outside?"
And the women (the Hospitality Center inside was 'owned' by Sutera Harbour, go figure)
began to direct me that it was outside and it was "that gray box outside, near the entrance."
Of course. Why didn't I think of that?
Because of course every grey box I see is an autopark payment counter!

---In my defense, I have NEVER been exposed to the way of autoparking, obviously enough.---

So I went outside, my brother tailing behind me like a burly bodyguard 
and approached an object that passed of as "a grey box" and tentively looked at the other side.

I was waving down my Dad as he and my other brother,
after parking the car and came to check up on our progress,
quite pleased that I found the booth.

I let an older man use it first because I was afraid it didn't give change.
(We were only there 10 minutes tops.)
I saw the man slipped in his ticket, then a 10 ringgit in it
and *plunk plunk* goes the change pocket.
He took it and went to his merry way.
I was quite dubious by this new relevation of technology in our town.

When all of us assembled, I excitedly slipped in the ticket
and hesitantly slipped in the 10 ringgit (it was slightly crinkled)
and our change was RM8.50
Are they going to give us that in coins?
No! It didn't.
On the other side of the coin pocket is the paper money pocket
and there was our change!
I might sound a little excited here but wow, this booth has 
the intelligence of an ATM machine!

But then how are they suppose to know that we payed?

When we finally drove off to the exit, I saw a similar grey machine
and I was like, "there's one RIGHT THERE!"
But it wasn't the same. Here's where'd you put the ticket.
No wonder they spit it back out from the machine earlier.

Dad put the payed ticket in the machine.
It swooped it in and never back out.
And the bargate in front went 90 degrees.

"So, where do we go now?" Dad asked.
In a not-so-simultaneous chorus, "Eat."

the booth was slightly on the left side of this place, outside

mischievous brother trying to hide from me and think I didn't know!

I Was Like Mary Poppins

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Quote of the Day:

Dad asked me to take a red umbrella with me into the airport in case it rains.
As we were leaving...

Me : Hey Pa, I think everybody's looking at me weirdly because of this umbrella.
Dad : *snootily* Why? Are you embarrassed by it?
Me : No, I think I'm pretty cool.

He Wants To Eat Ya!

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Mohinder giving me a cute meow.

I can't believe we're going to leave him soon :'(

Now That Song Is Permanently In My Head

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Is it weird that my friends *Like the video 
I shared in Facebook which was 
'Shiny Teeth and Me' from Fairly Oddparents 
because I had just learnt that 
Leonnie just had taken off her braces?


Don't you love them for it?



She's Waiting For Them To Grow

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Gardening books when buried will not flower.
- The Way Things Are, Roger McGough

It Is Ridiculously Savoury

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I am still going to school during the holidays for anything but summer school.
(Evidently, a teacher of mines is holding one for weak Malay Language.)
Well, success is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.
Not liking that percentage.


Memorable Quote of the Day

Teacher Tok commenting on how young Stephy's mum look.

Steph : She's 46.
T. Tok : *looks surprised* She looked like she could be near my age.
Steph : Oh, 40?
T. Tok : *tersely* 35.


Advice : Always say they look 20. ALWAYS.

Which kind of reminds me of my going to restaurant and always be called 'Kak' by the waitresses.

When I come : 
Selamat datang, Kak.
When I leave : Datang lagi, Kak.

But I'd be weekly greeted by that because I admit, the food there is just too good.

Don't they know that calling women 'Adik' is a general compliment unless it's 
which in this case, 



I'll Just Dot This Down

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Pooping---popping---like mushrooms.

Now I need to figure out which one to do.
All came just when I have bucketful of things to do.
Is it true then that inspirations strikes only, and only if,
you are actively conducting a very pressured amount of workload?


Hades Supports Awareness for Child Violence

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We're going to enter the second week of holiday.

I don't know why I'm watching each grain of sand 
falling down the hourglass like a murderer waiting for doom.

I should relax myself and set my goals for next year.
Reflect and prepare.
(I'm so happy how calm and centered I am!)

Sister : Do you want me to teach some Form 5 Physics?
Me : I'm kind of sleepy.

Not a good way to 'prepare.'
With SPM due in one year.
I feel awfully ill-prepared.
Oh well, I'll scold myself about that later.
I need to finish reading my story books :)

And I'm hearing too much electronic songs
that I am seriously thinking that it might dumb me down
with the pulsing (but oh so infectious) BOOM BOOM POW (no, not the song.)

And watching TV. But we watched Mulan just now and I don't think that's a bad thing.
We seriously memorized everything they say by heart
even the intonations of their speech and the sound effects
and even how they scream.
If only I remembered my studies like that.
If only.

Anyways, I have no idea why I'm updating this
(even updating it here is still a blur concept)
but I changed my profile picture in Facebook.
No, it's not an "ugly" picture of me.
(By ugly, a moderately good picture that I have
the nerve to caption it as ugly so people would
write nicety-ingested comments to me.)
No. But it's a picture of Hades from Disney's Hercules?
For the awareness of child abuse.
And if I could do only that, then it's fine for me.
Why Hades?, no real cause.
He's cool like that.

my status :

comments on the picture :

I kind of whitened Chan's picture there to avoid...identify theft.
(Since it's easy because all of our pictures are cartoons.)