No, Fists Works

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I could make something work.

As they say,
something stupid that works,
isn't stupid.

But I don't think it excuses you.
Let's just say its:


But I have something much more important to do.
The subject of 'You And What Should I Do With You'
is far far far far down my list of To-Do's.

I have undoubtedly grown since the last time we parted.
And I have gone so much farther.

To really appreciate myself,
you have to make me feel like I'm not.

Thank you.
And here.
*Punches Your Gut With My Fist*

I needed that, too.
You know,
to appreciate myself.

Matter Of Love Part 1

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Today, for Literature In English (aka LIE),
we learnt two poems about this infinite thing called ; Love.

(Oh, no. A cookie girl talking about cookie love!
What should I do?? WHAT??? *burn yourself*)

No need to do that.
I promise to be frankly frank.

Anyways, we've finish analyzing these two poems:


In the first poem, you could tell that the persona was deeply in love.
(That to show her love, she needs to count it first.)
And in the second one, it tells how incompatible a couple's love.
(She wants the guy to say it, he'd much rather show it.)

It was getting ironic how these two poem was printed back to back.

Oh well.
I strive in irony (ohyeah).

In the subject of love, it does make classroom full of girls a little excited.
(Can't you just hear the chit-chat now?)
And when the Madam Sim asked us how do we want
Our future partner to show his love, alright, it got me thinking.

In the matter of love, it does make me a little frustrated.
(Can't you just hear the sighs now?)
And when I start to mull on it like a bloated cat to a dead rat,

Perhaps, I decided, I want my future partner to be my best friend.
I believe in being close. Like watch-you-while-you-floss-close.
That close.

Sing me a song, sure. That's nice.
Give me chocolates. I'd finish under two minutes.
Say that you love me. I won't answer but my blushes would.
And pull out my chair like a gentleman. I won't deny your chivalry.

I just want to sleep on someone's shoulder.
Maybe that's why our shoulders has this slight, sweeping swoop to it.
It's a headrest.

Now I really feel like sleeping. 
---Oh no, when talking about love, she could write for days
but now thinking about sleep got her a little dozy.---

Conclusion for Today's Topic/Lesson/Blah :

In the matters of love, I have my own idea.
But I'd always try and figure out how to keep this one love.

I'm still finding my way :)
Give me the best of wishes.
I feel like it's still a long road ahead.
But it will be.
Worth it.


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I was in my bus on my way to the boys' school La Salle.
(I remember it was a rainy day.
Sitting next to the window near the sliding door have me drenched on my entire right side.
And what's worse than the smell of sweaty men on a hot day? 
Smell of sweaty men in the cold, closed-windowed bus. Ugh.)

But before that:
We were waiting for the traffic light to go green and while waiting
I just happen to stare aimlessly out the window like a heart-broken widow.
I saw a car with a manly-strong-peach colour that
waited beside my bus just at my range of vision.
I look at the driver, young 20-something. *Interest piqued.* 
My eyes fell to the wheels
and it took sometime to notice
but when I did my thought exclaimed, impressed:

Admittedly, in this small town, there aren't enough appreciation for car rims.
These rims looks like it cost major mon-ayy.

It was gold (obviously sprayed, or perhaps if it isn't, at least coated)
and in the middle there was a snarling lion's head.
I never have the chance to see one like that before.
No wonder the driver was so young.
No decent male above thirty-five would spend a dime on a worthless thing like that.
I immediately imagined this car driving up to a hotshot club's entrance
(whatever hotshot club there is here, so far I have no idea where there is one to be found)
with speakers booming in annoying rave song and the driver---oh dangit,
the driver saw me looking at him.
While I musingly scan from the rims to the driver,
I found out he was already looking at me.
As a well-thought out plan, I coolly spun my head around to the left
like it was a slow spintop.

'No, I wasn't looking at you. Our eyes met cuz it was you, sir, that looked at me,
an innocent girl who is bored in a bus. Please refrain from big-headedness.'

Ain't that embarrassing.

So when the traffic light switched the green, I looked at my left side to avoid the driver's curious look. Whatever man, I was just checkin out yo rims.
This is as much scrutiny to women as it gets: not just in football,
they have to wonder if we were serious when we say we like cars.
Get a grip.
And try to hold on.

UPDATE 21st AUGUST : In the second book, Catching Fire.
Last book going to be out this 24th August 2010.
I can be so lucky.

UPDATE 25th AUGUST : I got the the third book, Mockingjay.
I am so lucky.

Hiatusity Over Hunger

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I'm going to be lazy in blogging now
because I would rather much prefer to
sit in the corner and avidly reading this book:

let me tell you this book is amazing :)

of all the unimpressive books that
were made into a box-office successes,
why is this book's movie not out in the cinemas yet?
(though, a movie deal is done and I surely can't wait.)

know that my choice in books are like this :

1. Thick. 400++ only
3. Memorable & Strong Characters
4. Witty (Minus Dry Humour. I never get that.)
5. Small print.
6. Has at least ONE character with a weird name (for example, Hermione Granger, Harry Potter; Peeta Mellark, The Hunger Games; Blue Van Meer, Special Topics in Calamity Physics).
7. Smells Nice.

This book has almost all of those.
And I consider myself having good taste in books.




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Zombies needs some lime light people.
What happened to them?
They did their splash in the 80's.
But what happened to them now?
They lost their sex appeal?
Rotting flesh and missing teeth
Doesn't spell mmmmm?
Now people go for
Sparkling skin and fangs?

This is HORROR we're talking about
And horror is what I want
I give my gratitude to the makers of
A movie about zombies.

I want to see some limbs to fall apart
Some eyes to pop out in the literary matter
Perhaps even to my utter delight
A brain could blow up
Sending chunks of brain in the air

I haven’t seen a use of a brain
Since Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Where the guests eat chilled monkey brain
(To deceive my stomach, I assumed that
 the monkey brain was strawberry ice-cream
And the open monkey head was just fancy bowls. Like pineapples.)

So I demand for some good zombie movies.
But rewrite the 'must eat brain' part.
Go for the more controversial
"Live for Eternity" thing.
And spend some of those CGI for amazing effects
Of opened flesh and lidless eyes.
Maybe toss in some medical lessons in there too
But mostly just add in a lot of zombies
That cause innocent bystanders to go in a frenzy
That alone could satisfy me.

Long live zombies.
(Oh, wait…Hmm…)

one of the most amazing games on Earth, Plants Vs Zombies

The Assassination by a Unicorn

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it cuts deep man...deep

Bads Are Not The Worst

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I got a new Font. It is très jolie.
Love it so love it so.

Looks like this :
very pretty, non?

I feel very happy that I found this treasure of a font.
It would be a wonder in Photoshop.

Anyways, we had Malay Language Oral today
and we, um, failed.

Well, we all got 9 out of 10 in everything
But we know we did bad.
Very bad.

(But the reason we even went out was to not make teacher feel bad.
He was kind of angry that nobody was ready for this Oral Test.
We kind of jump ahead and do it SPONTANEOUS STYLE
and I was pretty much of zero paper to refer to. We were just bad, okay?
Even we admit it. But we all did, surprisingly, well. So it is just good blessings?)

Anyways, my teacher commented that we were :
satu forum yang ceria, ya?

Translation: A very...cheery forum.

It should have been formal.
Well, nothing is perfect.

Oh oh.
I was handing a Math Paper back
To a friend of mines,
while we were discussing (more mulling than animating)
for Malay Language Oral.
I hand it out on top of her and kind of signal it by
drifting it above her head.
She started to make this spazzed hair swish that made
her hair-band all of her hair tumbling down.
It was alarming enough to see that I thought
something was wrong with her.
We just stared.
"What was that?" she asked :O
I handed over the paper, "Your Maths paper."

And we racked over our chairs close to two minutes.
Oh Vadee, you give us something to blog about.
My love to you.
I'm sorry I tainted your image in such short seconds.

My bad.

But that really made my day :)

Scruple Hazardous

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I am being a little Hazardous for a Scruple but :

The  enamored side of me (the romantic/tipsy/flirty/poetic/overall poofy pink feminine side) told me to come out with something like a parent to a child to 'dip in' the public high-chlorine-content swimming pool.

Do something.

The logical side of me (the panic button/silent/chilly/intimidating/overall unapproachable steel side) scrambled to its feet and stomped down the idea like fire on mat and kept my lips locked shut safely.

Do not dare.

The reflexive side of me (the jolting/conspicous/spontaneous/accidental/overall oops! side) clenched my fist as the thought swept in and booted out in a flash and I tipped to my left side out of unbalance to the normal equilibrium.

Do make a decision already!

The sensing side of me (the ouch!/the mmm/the yowzah!/the what?/overall abundance of surprise side) felt the brushful scrape of my shoulder on his.

Do I felt something there...

My eyes flitted to him. 
He was staring back.

Enamor : Oh.


Reflex : *quirks elbow*

Sense : *tingles*

Lips : Hi.

And I found the lost side of me.

Clean Cut

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a new look
for a new me?

I just got well.
having my first arrival of the week to school tomorrow.

Not so dandy thinking about the homework.
But I cannot afford to miss my beloved Add Maths&Chemistry

Also my test results.
*swallows nervously*

So Hats Off?

officially off of vacation

Having The Last Laugh Part 3

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"Why must the good die young?
Because all the evil people killed them."

Lock And Swallow

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"When you truly believe in yourself, you don't need to pull other people down."
- Quinn Fabray, Glee

The quote tells it all.
I am always disturbed of blogs that dissed people they don't like.
Fat, Attention-Seeker or Repulsive
those are things I rather press a happy muffled pillow over.
I come across those kind of blogs more than I like to.

Why do that, right?
It doesn't make people respect you.
(Or do you really want people to hold no respect to you anymore?)
But who am I, in this world, to tell other people what to do?
There are enough people
out there who talk about other people
who talk about bad things about other people.

Why should I add myself into that pile?

Perhaps they should just be left alone in their shallow waters.
In the ignorance.
They'll learn through the thick mist.
Somehow, sometime.
Even if it's with the hard way.

"The most intelligent thing that Man can do is not talk."
There is some wisdom to that.

Kata Mulut, Badan Binasa

Rough Translation : Said the Mouth, Body Destroys

Now lock and swallow before it's too late.
(If you rather keep it open, then I wish you the best of wishes.)

this is too cute :p

Love This Line

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i speak



So Hard To Come By

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Well, I'm bored you see.
Suppose to study for Biology, Physics, History and Physical Ed (there's a paper for it. yes.)
But um. No. Felt like talking to a post :)

I began to think that I haven't shared enough.
About my life, plentiful. 
But what about what like? ---Did I sound narcissistic. I think so. My bad. 
On the other hand, this is good as a remembrance to myself.
When I can't recall what I use to hear in my 'early years.'
That would be nice.

I've finish some project and listen to songs. It helps me calm down.
Here, I just feel like posting a lyric.

One of my preferred songs from Danger Radio 
(and my preference to this band is endless),
Alive For The First Time.

click to play :)

Broken down and I can't sleep
Torn apart for all to see
Trying hard but feeling weak
From the suspension
Came along and you saved me
Held me high and helped me see
Calmed by your serenity
So I listen.

She said:
Maybe we'll escape and go into the water
Travel far away from fear and disaster
Take a chance and run now
I still can't believe 
Could you be the one that rescues me?

I'm alive for the first time
Let's see if can you rescue me
I've got a feeling like a third degree
I'm burning, baby, burning
Gonnna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time.

I'm alive for the first time
Let's see is it meant to be
I'm locked up can you find the key?
I'm burning, baby, burning
Gonna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time

Burnt by misconceptions
Torn by lies and misbelief
Holding strong as I seek 
On a path to redemption
Slowly dying underneath
She stands right beside of me
Never questions.

She said:
Maybe we'll escape and go into the water
Travel far away from fear and disaster
Take a chance and run now
I still can't believe 
Could you be the one that rescues me?

I'm alive for the first time.

Let's see can you rescue me
I've got a feeling like a third degree
I'm burning, baby, burning
Gonna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time.

I'm alive for the first time
Let's see can you rescue me
I've got a feeling like a third degree
I'm burning, baby, burning
Gonnna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time

I'm alive for the first time
Let's see is it meant to be
I'm locked up can you find the key
I'm burning, baby, burning
Gonna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time

I'm alive for the first time
Let's see can you rescue me
I've got a feeling like a third degree
I'm burning baby burning
Gonna lose my mind
And I feel alive for the first time.

I adore this song. 
It mixes grit and desperation so poetically.
One of the many reason I love (hearts, hearts, hearts involve)
Danger Radio.
They are simply.awesome.

that is my taste
for what i think
should be music.
got a problem?

Having The Last Laugh Part 2

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One would hope that I would be well.
I hope I would one day be too.
But on the other hand, you dont.
Your job, your pleasure, is to keep me with you.
And we both know that prevents me to be well.
If there was any person to be dubbed purely selfish:
You are it.
And if there was any person to be dubbed purely selfless:
No one is.
I have made a promise to myself.
And breaking a promise I made for myself is just wrong
So I would learn to be without you
And you in turn, need to learn to be without me
We will both suffer, I know.
It is a heavy price for our heavy mistake.
Understand: Your and my existence was not a mistake,
Our existence was.
You might hate me for leaving you.
And if you want to come back to me, I will not deny you.
We are just ill-advised. We cannot live without each other.
But we cannot live with each other any longer.
So here I say: I have let you go. Now do the same for me.

Dont let me go? Please, I have day job.

Shocking Poetry

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Story time.

English Class with Teacher Sim
is always an awesome train ride.
Since she's quite aware that most of us
are already quite capable in English,
she would give us tons of fun stuffs to do.

I feel like I'm back in kindergarten :p

So today's lesson is:

Poem Writing.
Our first task is:

Write a cinquain.

So the Golden Rule of Cinquain is like this:

Noun A
Two words that describes Noun A
Three verbs Noun A can do that end with -ing
A sentence related to Noun A
Noun B that is a synonym of Noun A

In partners, we wrote :

Polite, Nice
Greeting, Smiling, Waving
I want YOU to say hello

that is one of them, we wrote two.
but i forgot how the second one goes :/

And here is one I made today,
waiting for the clock to finish on my test:

Leather, Sparkle
Grinning, Screaming, Eyebrow-raising
The only thing that makes my cheeks burn

I was bored. Excuse me.

Anyways, we also make limericks.

But I sorta forgot about that one too.
Teacher has all the paper but I'll
be sure to write it down :)

And on Literature In English the next day,
(different subject, different class, same teacher)
we finished analyzing a poem
 with inhuman speed and found that there was over an hour left.

"Let's Write A Poem!!!" a classmate suggested, enthusiastic.
(Yesterday, this classmate of mines was making two poems
in a group and it ended up as...very suggestive.)

We all agreed
and Teacher Sim pounced on the chance.

Next Assignment (feeling Bond-ish now): 
Write a poem using Opposite Words.

Formidable challenge.
Let me just balance my pen (that shoots out laser!)
Again, the paper is absent in my hands
But once more, I promise to write it down :)

Writing these type of poems is hard.
You generally shoot it to people only.
But I managed to feign the persona was talking to a lover,
And I conclude it that it was a little girl reciting to her plush toy,
Captain Koala Bear of Faraway Palace.

Captain - For Jack Sparrow---my apologies---Captain Jack Sparrow.
Koala - For my favorite cat that was probably eaten by neighbors :*(
Bear - To know it's a plushiee.
Faraway Palace - To show this is just a fancy dream of a little girl :)

Hence the title : Lonely Girl.

I think through this week,
I manage to learn to love Poems.
And love writing them.
Future job : A Poet?

Not now.

I have Mid-Second Semester Exam now.
But ah, who cares about that?
( Epic plan : Flunk it and ACE everything 
in Final Exam to get Academic Leap. You just don't
get money from your A's but also Academic Leap.
More $$$. Geeee-nius.)

I'll end my post here by saying that I need to study (oh ha ha)
for Additional Mathematics (no ha ha)

Well, off I go.
*skips away with a raven*

how high will you soar if you are on the ground?